Sunday, April 30, 2006
What IF....
What IF i'm been born as a boy?
What IF i'm born without a certain body parts?
What IF i'm been born with a golden spoon?
What IF i have never met you?
What IF i have been more smarter?
What IF i'm deaf?
What IF i'm blind?
What IF i'm mute?
What IF i get knock down today and never got to tell my loved ones i love them?
What IF i struck lottery and become a millionaire overnight?
What IF i mudered someone out of anger?
What IF i don't get to say sorry to the person i let down and he/she is gone?
What IF we never been close friends, will we still hurt each other so much?
What IF we have never been together, will we still be friends?
Life is always filled with tons of What IF.. and we humans often think, What IF this What IF that... however, is there really a need to think? humans got to be forward moving and forward looking... the past is always a lesson learnt to prevent from making the same mistake in the future... but how many of us still commits the same mistakes all over again? it's contridicting aint it? but this is life... maybe thinking of the past let people find some excuses to seek comfort in them...
What IF my grandparents are still around?
was on the way home after wednesday lesson which ended at 6pm... took 174 and lighted at the church bus stop at boonlay... was waiting for bus 99... the bus seem particularly long to arrive that day when i overheard a conversation between a grandmother and her grandson... that brought be back thinking right there... grandparents... i do not have any particular memories of them at all huh... both my father's side and my maternal grandmother have passed on when i'm a year old... leaving only my maternal grandfather... however, he was a person who favourite boys over girls... there wasnt any interaction between me and him at all... still remembered he would drive to my house every weekend and bring my brother over for a stay... but never me... i questioned my mother and got the answer...
my mother used to tell me how my grandmothers used to carry me and praising me non-stop... but sadly, i never get to hear it from them myself... i sat there wondering, how was it like to have grandparents fetching you after school, bring you out to eat, sitting around them while they tell you long time ago stories, give you advices when you needed one, tell that your secrets that you won't even let your own mother know and just sitting around chatting... my mother trained us to be independent since very young... i still rememeber walking myself to school during kindergarten which is infront of my house and only having my babysitter to look out the window making sure i reached... all of the times i see parents/grandparents fetching their own child from the school gate... how i envy them, making me wonder... where is mine? maybe thats the reason i turned bad huh? resort to bad habits, hanging out late, mixing with groups of people i know i shouldnt be with and even yelling my parents with vulgarities... man! how i'm glad all these are over... i realised how stupid i am and childish i have been.. learn to be more cherish of myself, control my temper and being more responsible i guessed... but just wanna say, parents not being there for you is not a reason to turn bad... it's all up to yourself, how you think and how you handle the situation...
grandparents are always the pillar of the family i guessed... i used to go over to my maternal grandfather's house like a routine... all of us, all my mom's brothers and sisters... we would just sit there and chat... no need to do anything... just be there... i guessed many of you still do that dont you? but once my last grandfather passed on... hmmm... i guessed it has been months i ever stepped in to that house... =)
just wanna say.. treasure the person around you... sometimes you get to experience family ties that others might not get to experience in their whole life... there are times when you think that they are a nuisance... but let's stop and think, how much time do you all get to spend with one another according to the high standard of living nowadays... everyone is fighting hard for living and time just goes by quickly... slow down and take a look around you, you might find something that you least expected to... =)
What IF i'm been born as a boy?
What IF i'm born without a certain body parts?
What IF i'm been born with a golden spoon?
What IF i have never met you?
What IF i have been more smarter?
What IF i'm deaf?
What IF i'm blind?
What IF i'm mute?
What IF i get knock down today and never got to tell my loved ones i love them?
What IF i struck lottery and become a millionaire overnight?
What IF i mudered someone out of anger?
What IF i don't get to say sorry to the person i let down and he/she is gone?
What IF we never been close friends, will we still hurt each other so much?
What IF we have never been together, will we still be friends?
Life is always filled with tons of What IF.. and we humans often think, What IF this What IF that... however, is there really a need to think? humans got to be forward moving and forward looking... the past is always a lesson learnt to prevent from making the same mistake in the future... but how many of us still commits the same mistakes all over again? it's contridicting aint it? but this is life... maybe thinking of the past let people find some excuses to seek comfort in them...
What IF my grandparents are still around?
was on the way home after wednesday lesson which ended at 6pm... took 174 and lighted at the church bus stop at boonlay... was waiting for bus 99... the bus seem particularly long to arrive that day when i overheard a conversation between a grandmother and her grandson... that brought be back thinking right there... grandparents... i do not have any particular memories of them at all huh... both my father's side and my maternal grandmother have passed on when i'm a year old... leaving only my maternal grandfather... however, he was a person who favourite boys over girls... there wasnt any interaction between me and him at all... still remembered he would drive to my house every weekend and bring my brother over for a stay... but never me... i questioned my mother and got the answer...
my mother used to tell me how my grandmothers used to carry me and praising me non-stop... but sadly, i never get to hear it from them myself... i sat there wondering, how was it like to have grandparents fetching you after school, bring you out to eat, sitting around them while they tell you long time ago stories, give you advices when you needed one, tell that your secrets that you won't even let your own mother know and just sitting around chatting... my mother trained us to be independent since very young... i still rememeber walking myself to school during kindergarten which is infront of my house and only having my babysitter to look out the window making sure i reached... all of the times i see parents/grandparents fetching their own child from the school gate... how i envy them, making me wonder... where is mine? maybe thats the reason i turned bad huh? resort to bad habits, hanging out late, mixing with groups of people i know i shouldnt be with and even yelling my parents with vulgarities... man! how i'm glad all these are over... i realised how stupid i am and childish i have been.. learn to be more cherish of myself, control my temper and being more responsible i guessed... but just wanna say, parents not being there for you is not a reason to turn bad... it's all up to yourself, how you think and how you handle the situation...
grandparents are always the pillar of the family i guessed... i used to go over to my maternal grandfather's house like a routine... all of us, all my mom's brothers and sisters... we would just sit there and chat... no need to do anything... just be there... i guessed many of you still do that dont you? but once my last grandfather passed on... hmmm... i guessed it has been months i ever stepped in to that house... =)
just wanna say.. treasure the person around you... sometimes you get to experience family ties that others might not get to experience in their whole life... there are times when you think that they are a nuisance... but let's stop and think, how much time do you all get to spend with one another according to the high standard of living nowadays... everyone is fighting hard for living and time just goes by quickly... slow down and take a look around you, you might find something that you least expected to... =)
4:35 PM
Live for the moment ...
Just Being Me
*yahmei- yahyah* Darkness, often being portray as mysterious, uncertainties & curiosity atmosphere..
A person who fancy the darkness which brings a sense of warmth being seek in life..
A person who constantly seek the truth behind the walls of darkness..
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